Scissored or Caesar'd: Act 3

Summary of Act 3: The conspirators assassinate the Decoy Protagonist Julius Caesar. Mark Antony manipulates the mob to kill the conspirators.

Scene 1

The soothsayer we saw in the last act, Arty, tries to warn Caesar, saying that his "suit" (petition?) affects Caesar more. Caesar says that in that case, he'll read it last. Bad choice. The conspirators, Shady Faction, have a little scare when a random Senator wishes them luck into their "enterprise", but he's not referring to their planned assassination.

A guy called Metellus Cimber pleads to Caesar to pardon his father. He kneels, but Caesar brushes him off. Then everyone kneels, including Caesar's BFF Brutus. Caesar rambles on about how he's "constant as the northern star", and essentially, he says no.

Then the conspirators stab him, including Brutus. Caesar channels his French: "Et tu, Brute? Then fall, Caesar."

Dunno why everyone focuses on the first bit when the second is infinitely more beautiful. A moment ago, this guy was making himself out to be as almighty as the stars, but when he sees his friend's betrayal, he is perfectly willing to just fall down and die. If that's not a tearjerker, I don't know what is.

The conspirators cheer and run around. Antony, Caesar's right-hand man, shows up and grieves. He tells the conspirators to get on with it if they want to kill him too, but instead Brutus promises to let him speak at Caesar's funeral. Cassius is not happy about this, but Brutus says everything is okay. Guess who's right?

They leave Antony onstage, who delivers a pretty good soliloquy on how he's going to expose the conspirators. Then he tells Octavius Caesar (adopted heir of JC) via servant-owl to stay away until he sorts things out.

Scene 2

The mob is pissed that the conspirators killed Caesar. Brutus delivers a speech that is mediocre by Shakespearean standards. The mob immediately agrees that Caesar had to be killed. Okay then.

Antony shows up. Brutus leaves. Antony makes a speech to the mob that is truly amazing. It's very long, but the essence is that he's condemning the conspirators. The mob immediately agrees that the conspirators have to be killed. Okaaaay then. They run off to torch the conspirators' houses.

Antony is pleased at the chaos he wrought, and goes to find Octavius Caesar.

Scene 3

Cinna the poet walks in. No, he's not Cinna the conspirator. I do wish he was the tailor instead, though.

The mob comes in and asks Cinna's name. He gives it and is mistaken for the conspirators. They tear him to pieces despite his protests, because his name is Cinna. Oh, and for his "bad verses".

Moral: Do not mess with the mob. And if you've been paying attention to global politics, I think more than a few people should learn from Shakespeare.

Next up: Act 4. Nothing much happens.